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Welcome to our adult relationships humor, funny articles and sex jokes!
If these pick up lines don't work, you might have to work on your delivery!
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Worlds Best Pick Up Artists Reveal Secrets!
Try Hitting On the Single Babes with These!!
Try Hitting On the Single Babes with These!!
Old Popular Standby Pick Up Lines
Your body's name must be Visa, because it's everywhere I want to be.
Can I buy you a drink, or do you just want the money
I may not be Fred Flintstone, but I bet I can make your bed rock
I may not be the best looking guy here, but I'm the only one talking to you.
Yo Baby, you be my Dairy Queen, I'll be your Burger King, you treat me right, and I'll do it your way.
Excuse me, do you have your phone number, I seem to have lost mine.
I can't find my puppy, can you help me find him? I think he went into this cheap motel room.
I'm new in town, could I have directions to your house.
If you were a new hamburger at McDonald's, you would be McGorgeous.
You might not be the best looking girl here, but beauty is only a light switch away
Your body's name must be Visa, because it's everywhere I want to be.
Can I buy you a drink, or do you just want the money
I may not be Fred Flintstone, but I bet I can make your bed rock
I may not be the best looking guy here, but I'm the only one talking to you.
Yo Baby, you be my Dairy Queen, I'll be your Burger King, you treat me right, and I'll do it your way.
Excuse me, do you have your phone number, I seem to have lost mine.
I can't find my puppy, can you help me find him? I think he went into this cheap motel room.
I'm new in town, could I have directions to your house.
If you were a new hamburger at McDonald's, you would be McGorgeous.
You might not be the best looking girl here, but beauty is only a light switch away
Editors Favorite (This one actually worked several times)
"If it's true that we are what we eat, then I could be you by morning."
Seeking to Pick Up Women and Score some Booty?
Here's the best pick up come on lines ever recorded!
Cut to the Chase Pick Up Lines
Spice Up Your Sex Life! fun kinky fetish toys- I wish you were a door so I could slam you all day.
- Nice legs...what time do they open?
- Do you work for UPS? I thought I saw you checking out my package.
- You've got 206 bones in your body, want one more?
- Can I buy you a drink or do you just want the money?
- I may not be the best looking guy in here, but I'm the only one talking to you.
- I'm a bird watcher and I'm looking for a Big Breasted Bed Thrasher: have you seen one?
- I'm fighting the urge to make you the happiest woman on earth tonight.
- Want to play army? I'll lay down and you can blow the hell outta me.
- I wish you were a Pony Carousel outside Superdrug, so I could ride you all day long for a quarter.
- Oh, I'm sorry, I thought that was a Braille name tag.
- I'd really like to see how you look when I'm naked.
- Is that a ladder in your stockings or the stairway to heaven?
- You might not be the best looking girl here, but beauty is only a light switch away.
- Are those real?
- You must be the limp doctor because I've got a stiffy.
- I'd walk a million miles for one of your smiles, and even farther for that thing you do with your tongue.
- If it's true that we are what we eat, then I could be you by morning.
- (Look down at your crotch) Well It's not just going to suck itself.
- You know, if I were you, I'd have sex with me.
- You. Me. Whipped cream. Handcuffs. Any questions?
- F@# me if I'm wrong, but is your name Sherry Titsbottom?
- Those clothes would look great in a crumpled heap on my bedroom floor.
- My name is (name)...remember that, you'll be screaming it later.
- Do you believe in love at first sight or should I walk by again?
- Hi, I'm Mr. Right. Someone said you were looking for me.
- My friend wants to know if YOU think I'M cute.
- Hi. The voices in my head told me to come over and talk to you.
- My name isn't Elmo, but you can tickle me anytime you want to.
- I know milk does a body good, but DAMN, how much have you been drinking?
- If you were the last woman and I was the last man on earth, I bet we could do it in public.
- Wanna come over for some pizza and sex? No? Why? Don't you like pizza?
- Baby, I'm an American Express lover...you shouldn't go home without me.
- Do you sleep on your stomach? Can I???
- Do you wash your pants in Windex? Because I can see myself in them.
- I lost my puppy. Can you help me find him? I think he went into this cheap motel room.
- (Lick finger and wipe on her shirt) Let's get you out of these wet clothes.
The single women's pick up line survival guide (Swiped from a chick site for your personal Intel)
Man: Haven't we met before?
Woman: Yes, I'm the receptionist at the VD Clinic.
Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before?
Woman: Yeah, that's why I don't go there anymore.
Man: Is this seat empty?
Woman: Yes, and this one will be too if you sit down.
Man: So, wanna go back to my place ?
Woman: Well, I don't know. Will two people fit under a rock?
Man: Your place or mine?
Woman: Both. You go to yours and I'll go to mine.
Man: I'd like to call you. What's your number?
Woman: It's in the phone book.
Man: But I don't know your name.
Woman: That's in the phone book too.
Man: So what do you do for a living?
Woman: I'm a female impersonator.
Man: What sign were you born under?
Woman: No Parking.
Man: Hey, baby, what's your sign?
Woman: Do not Enter
Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning?
Woman: Unfertilized !
Man: Hey, come on, we're both here at this bar for the same reason
Woman: Yeah! Let's pick up some chicks!
Man: I'm here to fulfill your every sexual fantasy.
Woman: You mean you've got both a donkey and a Great Dane?
Man: I know how to please a woman.
Woman: Then please leave me alone.
Man: I want to give myself to you.
Woman: Sorry, I don't accept cheap gifts.
Man: I can tell that you want me.
Woman: Ohhhh. You're so right. I want you to leave.
Man: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy:
Woman: Yeah, but if I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.
Man: Hey cutie, how 'bout you and I hitting the hot spots?
Woman: Sorry, I don't date outside my species.
Man: Your body is like a temple.
Woman: Sorry, there are no services today.
Man: I'd go through anything for you.
Woman: Good! Let's start with your bank account.
Man: I'd love to get into your pants.
Woman: No thanks, I already have one a**hole in there already.
Man: I would go to the end of the world for you.
Woman: Yes, but would you stay there?
Man: Haven't we met before?
Woman: Yes, I'm the receptionist at the VD Clinic.
Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before?
Woman: Yeah, that's why I don't go there anymore.
Man: Is this seat empty?
Woman: Yes, and this one will be too if you sit down.
Man: So, wanna go back to my place ?
Woman: Well, I don't know. Will two people fit under a rock?
Man: Your place or mine?
Woman: Both. You go to yours and I'll go to mine.
Man: I'd like to call you. What's your number?
Woman: It's in the phone book.
Man: But I don't know your name.
Woman: That's in the phone book too.
Man: So what do you do for a living?
Woman: I'm a female impersonator.
Man: What sign were you born under?
Woman: No Parking.
Man: Hey, baby, what's your sign?
Woman: Do not Enter
Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning?
Woman: Unfertilized !
Man: Hey, come on, we're both here at this bar for the same reason
Woman: Yeah! Let's pick up some chicks!
Man: I'm here to fulfill your every sexual fantasy.
Woman: You mean you've got both a donkey and a Great Dane?
Man: I know how to please a woman.
Woman: Then please leave me alone.
Man: I want to give myself to you.
Woman: Sorry, I don't accept cheap gifts.
Man: I can tell that you want me.
Woman: Ohhhh. You're so right. I want you to leave.
Man: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy:
Woman: Yeah, but if I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.
Man: Hey cutie, how 'bout you and I hitting the hot spots?
Woman: Sorry, I don't date outside my species.
Man: Your body is like a temple.
Woman: Sorry, there are no services today.
Man: I'd go through anything for you.
Woman: Good! Let's start with your bank account.
Man: I'd love to get into your pants.
Woman: No thanks, I already have one a**hole in there already.
Man: I would go to the end of the world for you.
Woman: Yes, but would you stay there?
Adultfriendfinders - Largest Nude Sex Personals Adult picture sex personals with 11 million registered members, most with nude or semi-naked profiles! Without a doubt the ultimate in sexy online dating, this adult dating site boasts one of the largest sex dating communities on the Web. It's not just an adult matchmaking site or service, it is a fully functioning adult singles community! Here you will find online video chats, adult photo galleries, and adult dating articles. If you looking for erotic encounters and the best in adult dating and activities, this is the service for you. Largest Adult Personals with over 10 million registered members! If you want a site who emphasis on 'adult' and 'sex' then this site is for you. swingers | lesbian | latina | asian | mature | interracial
Spice Up Your Sex Life! fun kinky fetish toys
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